Tough Days

It is amazing how I sometimes feel that infetility equals unexplainable points of depression and extreme doubt. The last two days have been hard for me! I have been in the dumps because our one year anniversary of TTC is tomorrow; we still have no baby to hold. My faith is so strong right now, so I am not doubting that the Lord can do this for us...just wondering how long we will be waiting. A year so far, a series of days, weeks and months...nothing more; nothing less. Funny, how the time just sneaks up on you and then, it happens, the one year mark comes and goes and it has now become one year and one day, then one year and one week and then one year and six months.

I guess that the last two days were not made any better when dear friends of ours asked us if we would be Godparents for their second son. We were honored, but at the same time, it was another reminder that my womb is still barren. It broke my heart to hear my DH ask, "Why are we always Godparents and never parents." He said it jokingly, but I know deep down inside he is as disappointed as I am. Disappointed, not defeated!

So, I am preparing my heart and mind fin prayer for moving into year two, which appears to hold a new set of challenges and decisions to be made. I just want to keep my head up and stay strong in mind, body and soul. I know that the Lord will strengthen us as needed to get through this next season of life.

I wanted to leave with you 5 things that I have learned this year:
1. Always start TTC earlier than when you want a baby, because you never know how long it will take.
2. Put value in the strength of your marriage through the Lord.
3. God has given us infertility. becasue every couple cannot handle the stress and heartache that it brings.
4. Marry a man that will love you no matter how much he knows that one day a part of you may disappoint him.
5. And last but not least, God is faithful, even when we are not.

You all be blessed in His love...NikNak