Not too bad so far...

Today, I took my first Clomid pill. I guess I was expecting some big event to occur or some side effects to come on immediately...nothing. No moodiness, no headaches, no nausea, no vomitting, nothing...I praise God for that. I just hope and pray that the next four days will offer me the same delight. Sakira....stop smiling.

On this journey, I have found myself often embarrased by our inability to conceive. When I think back on those moments, I realize how silly I am. I guess it is because a part of me believes that my barreness is caused by some ugly sin in my life that I cannot seem to walk away from. I then become very critical of myself and feel even more inadequate. I wonder why I do this, because it has no benefit to my mental or emotional state. It takes me five seconds to get into that mood and then five days to get out of that mood...oh the torture. My prayer is that everytime that I see this mood coming, that I can cut it off at the pase and take the focus off of me and place it on God. I can only be embarrased if I focus on myself and my inability, but with God, there is power, and He is the source of ALL things!

I am not thrilled about putting this drug in my body, but my as my DH says, he can keep sending the bus to the bus stop every month, but if there are no kids to board, then the bus drives off. I just pray that there are children waiting there for the bus this month and it would great if no more than two get on board and take a ride....BEEP....BEEP. Be blessed!

Nik Nak

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is

lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Philippians 4:8